[Does he?! He still feels like he can't possibly be understanding this right—but at this point, there's nothing left to think. The reality is finally beginning to penetrate his skull. Kyosuke had said he loved him, and then kissed him. His brain looks for any other possible way to interpret it and comes up blank. The only explanation is . . . this, right here.
He manages not to lean in and close the distance again, but it takes a lot of effort; for a moment he looks like he might. His expression overall has no fucking idea what to do other than look stunned, until finally, he begins to smile. Awkward, tentative, but how can he help it?!]
Aah . . . sorry if I . . . got carried away there.
[That is like .000001% of how carried away he could get right now. He could literally carry Kyosuke away, all the way back to his room. No! Don't get caught up in that shit yet!]
I, uh. Uhhh. —I . . . guess now isn't really the time to work everything out.
[God, that's right. Not five minutes ago, Kyosuke had been absolutely losing his shit, and with good reason. Juzo swallows down a lump in his throat. How selfish is he to even think about this right now when he should be supportive instead?!]
Can you walk yet? You've gotta get dried off. You could probably use a drink, too. I'll—I'll be here however you need me, Kyosuke. Just leave it to me.
[Part of Kyosuke wants to feel good in this moment, to be able to relish some happiness in that kiss. But there's a good degree of surprise still, and a quickly-encroaching feeling of exhaustion as what's left of his anger and bitterness drains away into numbness.
How long have they been outside in this self-inflicted weather? He's lost all track of time.]
Yes. Let's-- [He doesn't even know where to take that thought, and he expresses that with a shake of his head, further messing up his drenched hair.] Is there even anything open? Maybe we should just retire for the night.
I've got beer at home, at least, but—I should probably help you back to your own place instead. I want you to be comfortable.
[Not that Juzo's place isn't, but it's still unfamiliar territory, maybe not the most comforting thing in the moment. And then he'd be stuck there with Juzo. Right now, Juzo's not even sure if Kyosuke would rather be with him or alone. Should he stay, when they get back inside? Leave him? Maybe it'll be more clear when the moment comes.
He forces himself to pull back and to his feet and extends a hand to help Kyosuke up, if he wants it.]
[Instead of immediately reaching for Juzo's hand, Kyosuke lingers long enough touch the roses that had sprouted in the middle of everything. There's a minimal amount of rainwater on the plant, further cementing that it had just appeared.
He accepts Juzo's help shortly after, suppressing a heavy sigh and focusing instead on the flowers as they start walking.]
The roses from the other day. They were from you?
[The thought should probably bewilder him more, but it's so innocuous after everything else that he can't help being faintly amused.]
[Juzo's hand can't decide whether to drop Kyosuke's or not as they walk. He waffles between the two, his grip loosening as if to let their fingers slip apart and their arms swing loose again, then tightening to maintain the contact. They're still touching as the two of them head away from the tree and the tower and back towards their apartments, and once in a while, another rose begins to blossom when Juzo's foot comes down on the crack between cobbles in the road. The air has gone pleasantly warm and dry—a complete contrast to the heavy, freezing rain of before.
And if all that weren't embarrassing enough, then Kyosuke asks about the roses!
Juzo huffs out a short, nervous laugh, refusing eye contact, though he doesn't pull his hand away.]
Yeah. . . . You sent me something on Valentine's Day. If you knew how much I obsessed over those flowers and that letter, you'd really understand how pathetic I am. I couldn't stop myself from sending something back. Even though I knew—Yukizome told me all about how you two—
[He stops and shakes his head.
At the time, he'd felt like he was sharing a happy moment with his best friend. The culmination of her feelings at last. Of course she'd tell Juzo, and of course Juzo would be happy for her, but now . . . now he can't know. He doesn't want to think about it.]
—So I felt like shit about it, but I couldn't stop myself from sending you something for White Day.
It's not like I'd ever done anything like that before in my life. There's no Valentine's Day or White Day for homos. I wouldn't've dared.
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He manages not to lean in and close the distance again, but it takes a lot of effort; for a moment he looks like he might. His expression overall has no fucking idea what to do other than look stunned, until finally, he begins to smile. Awkward, tentative, but how can he help it?!]
Aah . . . sorry if I . . . got carried away there.
[That is like .000001% of how carried away he could get right now. He could literally carry Kyosuke away, all the way back to his room. No! Don't get caught up in that shit yet!]
I, uh. Uhhh. —I . . . guess now isn't really the time to work everything out.
[God, that's right. Not five minutes ago, Kyosuke had been absolutely losing his shit, and with good reason. Juzo swallows down a lump in his throat. How selfish is he to even think about this right now when he should be supportive instead?!]
Can you walk yet? You've gotta get dried off. You could probably use a drink, too. I'll—I'll be here however you need me, Kyosuke. Just leave it to me.
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How long have they been outside in this self-inflicted weather? He's lost all track of time.]
Yes. Let's-- [He doesn't even know where to take that thought, and he expresses that with a shake of his head, further messing up his drenched hair.] Is there even anything open? Maybe we should just retire for the night.
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[Not that Juzo's place isn't, but it's still unfamiliar territory, maybe not the most comforting thing in the moment. And then he'd be stuck there with Juzo. Right now, Juzo's not even sure if Kyosuke would rather be with him or alone. Should he stay, when they get back inside? Leave him? Maybe it'll be more clear when the moment comes.
He forces himself to pull back and to his feet and extends a hand to help Kyosuke up, if he wants it.]
Let's go.
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He accepts Juzo's help shortly after, suppressing a heavy sigh and focusing instead on the flowers as they start walking.]
The roses from the other day. They were from you?
[The thought should probably bewilder him more, but it's so innocuous after everything else that he can't help being faintly amused.]
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And if all that weren't embarrassing enough, then Kyosuke asks about the roses!
Juzo huffs out a short, nervous laugh, refusing eye contact, though he doesn't pull his hand away.]
Yeah. . . . You sent me something on Valentine's Day. If you knew how much I obsessed over those flowers and that letter, you'd really understand how pathetic I am. I couldn't stop myself from sending something back. Even though I knew—Yukizome told me all about how you two—
[He stops and shakes his head.
At the time, he'd felt like he was sharing a happy moment with his best friend. The culmination of her feelings at last. Of course she'd tell Juzo, and of course Juzo would be happy for her, but now . . . now he can't know. He doesn't want to think about it.]
—So I felt like shit about it, but I couldn't stop myself from sending you something for White Day.
It's not like I'd ever done anything like that before in my life. There's no Valentine's Day or White Day for homos. I wouldn't've dared.